Furlough

Yesterday morning while I was messing around on Facebook I received an invitation to go out for lunch from my friend, LaTwon.  This was an amazing surprise because we used to work together at United Airlines and it had been several years since we had last seen eachother.  We met a lifetime ago as newbies, she, Elizabeth, and I on our first day on the job.  Babies have been born, people have quit, moved away, lay offs, and of course illness, but we have fought it out.  I have been blessed to find diamond souls in my life.  LawTwon is a wonderful mom, and a good woman, again, a diamond soul.

I was so excited to go out I got all dolled up.  See, I even put on makeup?!  (Not done since summer).  As soon as I walked out the door the feeling was palpable...freedom.  I felt like I had just received a prison furlough.  I almost did that thing where you run and slide on top of the car to get to the other side.  You know what I'm talking about?  Yep, that's how happy I felt.  Immediately  we were laughing and catching up on eachother's lives, oh, how wonderful!  But, the longer I sat in the restaurant it was as if the warden of my prison, was whispering to me--I wasn't free.  "The pain."  Naturally, it had been with me the whole time.  I had tried to take precautionary measures but they were wearing off and now I was ready to start a prison riot.  As I sat there I wiggled and squirmed trying to get my back, hips and neck in a sort of comfortable position, ha!  The pain was getting louder and louder like my own Tell Tale Heart.  Do you know how difficult it is to pay attention to a conversation when you are in pain and have fibro fog?  Not so easy my friends.  I do carry my medical marijuana with me everywhere but it's hard to just walk out, smoke, and come in.  Plus laws don't exactly allow it.  Atlast, the time arrived, we left.  Ahh, relief!  We hugged and parted ways, I came home and immediately collapsed in bed.  But wait, there's more!  I'm not complaining I'm sharing my experience with you so you know what I go through.  I awoke last night around 7:30 aching in so much pain from sitting in a booth at lunch with my friend.  And today I woke up early feeling the same.  I just couldn't sleep in because my body won't allow me.  What kind of freak am I?  I have already said in my blog, and anyone who knows me knows that this illness has been a blessing in my life.  I've learned so much, and given opportunities I otherwise wouldn't have and would never say, "why me?" But can't I say, "what's up with my freaky body?!"  Trust me I know things could always be worse.  This is something I think about all the time.  But to you fibromyalgia why is it there is no rhyme or reason to you?  No wonder they gave you a name that starts with a big fat letter F!